Episode 49: ASSiago Cheez

Wally photoshopped, what time you should not call Jess, neighbor weirdness, which Golden Girls character we relate to, a potential name change for the show, complaints about sarcasm, potential employers asking to see your social media, buying a house, selling a house, and bank f**ery all in one episode? You're welcome, America.

We imagine Wally as a Senator, the radio station dropping the ball on things happening in its local community, the last K-Mart and stores that file for bankruptcy, misleading political memes and posts, new scam calls, a letter from Donald J Trump, states where it's illegal to cheat on your spouse, and Chris teaches accents.

This week, we cover Wally's adventures in computer stuff, an Ivermectin delivery, Chris draws the line at feet, P Diddy, real men and skid marks, the punchline from Chris we never get to hear, Jess has an offensive shirt "oops", people who don't follow the rules, peeing the bed, and the difference between men and women. As you can see, while the technical quality is better than last week, nothing else is.

If you look up "disaster" in the dictionary, you'll see the three of us waving at you from this episode. First Wally has computer problems, then Jess does. We've cobbled together an episode in which we talk about computer problems A LOT, and there is drastic mid-sentence change in audio quality. Obviously, we talk about the debate.... and Springfield. Also Selena Gomez in the billionaire's club, a 5 minute butt-dial, Jess did NOT get a CMA nomination, Wally misses the good old days of software, attractive women then and now, and bullies then and now. If there was ever a time for us to ask you NOT to rate us on Apple Podcasts, this would be it.

In a shocking turn of events, Wally doesn't understand his computer; plus the Chase bank "glitch," racism at Walmart, the most potty-mouthed state in the Union, and the ways in which Jess has grown into her bitchiness. It's like Kindergarten, but for adults (I know you are, but what am I?) Help us out and leave us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, would ya? Even if you listen somewhere else.

Wally's schedule confusion, car trouble, the state fair competition Jess will not be participating in, radio in the public interest, the cult of Jeep drivers, swingers, and gun ownership. You're gonna love this episode at least as much as your last dental appointment. Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts, please and thank you.

Insurance company drama, the ages of "old" people on TV when we were kids, the women in Wally's life keep finding dead bodies, Tennesseans are mad about toll lanes, who was thinking of Chris while on the toilet, annoying appointment reminders and "confirmations," and the cost of selling houses.

That noise Wally's phone makes, an idea for new guests, an update on the trash can neighbor, the reason Chris crapped on the floor, Jenna makes her podcast debut (kinda), music artists who've put the moves on us (or who we've wanted to), the awfulness of local news, and people in radio who think you're an a-hole because you tell them no. Because who among us is REALLY an a-hole?

A near death experience, Wally is very upset by the name of a store, scams and fake news, a traumatic public restroom experience, tipping culture, the racist bacon traffic report, and in a surprising turn of events, Wally doesn't know what a widget is, but it turns out Jess's computer DID record the whole show. Because what a tragedy to miss even a second of this drivel.

Air conditioning (Jess DOES have central air, Wally), Jess finds a new best friend to bond with over crappy exes, the two of us who belong barefoot in the kitchen, neighbor weirdness, what's in Wally's algorithm, the hawk tuah girl, aging and medical conditions, and euphoric peeing. See, this is the kind of quality entertainment you can't get just anywhere.